2/10/12

Wow so it has been a crazy last two months!  I feel like a fell of the wagon.  I have lost only 9 pounds in the last two months.  but I guess that is better then gaining 9 lbs.  When I went home my mom and grandma were very supportive but it got me off of my routine.  I do not like change.  So once I have something going like my diet routine it was way different being home and being on some body else's routine.  It was a nice eye opener on how the it will be when I get back to just maintaining vs.  trying to lose weight.  I went and weighed in yesterday and lost 5.8 lbs.  for a grand total of 120.2 lbs lost. I now weigh in at 236.8 lbs.  It has been a battle but one that I am winning.  I have caught myself cheating for no reason.  I will see something that looks good and I will have a bite or two.  Now in the long run that will not hurt me but when I am trying to get to my goal it just keeps me that much farther away. 

I have recently started playing basketball three days a week over my lunch hour.  It is an amazing feeling to be up and about and running around with out all that extra weight.  It has thrown my shot off quite a bit because I can actually jump now so that is something that I will have to get used to.   It is a great feeling to be able to run for an hour straight and only be winded vs. being out of breath from walking up some stairs. 

I have found my job is getting easier as well.  I am able to climb up and do things that I would never imagined possible before.  I also feel more focused and my mind is not else where when it should be at work.

I have noticed how flexible I actually am.  When in a standing position I can bend over and put my palms flat on the floor.  I can actually put my nose on my knee.  These are only little things but they have made the world of difference to me.  Another small victory for me was the other day I was looking at shirts on JC Penny's website.  I could actually order shirts that fit me and could get the ones I wanted vs having to get shirt solely based on the shirts available in the size I needed.  One of the down falls to the life change.  Today I was walking out side and slipped on a patch of ice.  IT HURT! I miss having all that extra padding to soften my landing.  But I guess I will just have to live with that pain.  After all it is a good pain. 

I am starting to see the light at the end of the tunnel.  And it is not as scary as it used to be.  I was worried that I was going to have a lapse and just gain a bunch of weight back, but now I know that I am going to be alright.  Being healthy will allow me to have fun in other ways that I never thought I would be able to enjoy.  I actually will want to go for hikes and see places you can only get to on foot vs. just being ok with seeing them in photos.  I want to be active and have an eventful life.  Where in the past my life was based on eating and drinking.  It is sad that that is the truth but it is a lesson that I have learned about my self. 

12/13/11

It has been 3 weeks since I last updated you on my progress.  Well I have been extremely busy at work and have not gotten much sleep.  The first week I lost 2.6lbs and then the second week I lost 2.4 lbs  So not great weeks but at least I have not gained weight yet.  These two weeks made me think to my self about my journey and how crazy it has been.  I started thinking about the things that made me get to 357 lbs.  I have had a lot of things happen in my life not as many as other but enough.  I have always dealt with everything by eating or drinking.  How unhappy was I or how much did I hate myself to punish my body with 357lbs. I started to realize that if I don't deal with some demons from the past then I will probably go right back to where I started from unless I learn how to deal with them.  I am scared because I do see the end of the tunnel and I don't know how I am going to react.  I have never been small before.  What does this great adventure have in store for me?  Well despite all of my fears this last week I lost 7.6 lbs to get me down to 252.2lbs for a grand total of weight loss of 104.8 lbs.  I have heard stories of people who have lost a 100 lbs but to actually be one of them is crazy.  I am so excited about passing that mark but at the same time can't believe that I let myself go and get up to where I was.  I still have one more week before I head home for Christmas and see my family which some of them I have not seen in over a year!  I am definitely looking forward to flying again and this time I won't have to ask for the seat belt extender!

11/22/11

Well it was a weird week!  I had another big week.  I lost 7.6lbs this week again. I am down to 264.8lbs.  and have lost 92.2lbs. For some reason I don't feel good about this week.  I feel I cheated a lot this week.  I went out to eat several times this week.  I stuck to what I could have but I just felt like it wasn't going to be that good of week.  Well it was so I guess I should be great full for how it worked out.  I guess it just goes to show me that I can go out and eat with friends and stay true to the diet.  I am learning that you can ask for your order to be "special." In the past I would order what was on the menu and eat it how ever it came out even if it was wrong.  Now I will ask for them to hold the potatoes and and extra broccoli. The good news is I am now smaller then I ever remember being in High School.  That is an amazing feeling.  I have moved down 14 notches on my belt and ready to add another hole. Here are some photo updates.

 In the top photo I weighed 357 and the shorts I was wearing were size 50 and as you can see didn't quite fit.   The lower photo I weighed 272.4 and the jeans I am wearing are size 42.

Once again In the top photo I weighed 357 and the shorts I was wearing were size 50 and as you can see didn't quite fit.   The lower photo I weighed 272.4 and the jeans I am wearing are size 42.

 I have just a little over a month before I head home for Christmas and see my friends and family.  I am really excited to fly this time because I will actually fit in my own seat and not have to share the person's  next to me.  I am also excited to see my grandma for her 80th birthday on Christmas day She saw me at the end of September and hasn't seen photo's since so it will be a surprise to her.

11/15/11

So it was a great week.  7.6lbs this week!  bringing me down to 272.4lbs.  and 84.4 lbs lost! What is really cool is the scanner that tells you your lean mass (how much your muscle and bones all weigh)  I gained 2lbs of muscle this week and lost 7.6lbs of fat. I couldn't believe it.  That is the third highest weight loss week after my first two weeks of the diet.   I wanna thank my mother for my early Christmas present which I feel is very much responsible for the great results this week.  The camelbak!  She bought me the 2L one or 70 oz bag.  I drink 4 of those a day plus at meals I drink water as well.  The only down fall is the constantly having to go to the bathroom.  I went to a movie the other day and during the 1hr and 45 min movie I had to get up and go to the bathroom 3 times.   It has to be the water because that is the only thing that I have started doing different.  I also found an app on my droid that I can set it up and it will remind me through out the day to drink water.  That has come in pretty handy when ever I get busy and lose track of my drinking.  I am only 7.4 lbs away from being the same weight when I was my lightest in High School.  and only 15.6 lbs from breaking past the 100 lb mark.  I have new pictures I will hopefully post in the next couple of days.

11/8/11

So close to being out of the 280's but I didn't make it.  I was exactly 280 today.  I lost 4.6lbs this week for a total of 77lbs so far.  I can't tell if it is getting easier or harder.  It is just a lot of work to make the right choices. I am trying to keep myself busy because that makes it much easier.  If I am busy I am not by myself thinking about how hungry I am.  My wonderful mother purchased me a Camelbak for an early Christmas present.  Which has been great!  It looks kind of goofy walking around with a water bag on my back all the time but it makes drinking water a lot easier. It will be 3 months on the 10th.  That is crazy!!  I realized I am not going to make my goal by Thanksgiving so I have decided that I am going to change my goal.  I want to be out of the 270's by Thanksgiving.  I have decided that I am not going to be able make it through the winter with the coats that I have.  They are all to big.  So I am going to have to go buy a coat to get me through this "middle section" of my diet.

11/1/11

So it has been two weeks since my last post.  I was having some trouble last week.  I lost a lot of motivation I felt like I was following the diet very closely but I also was very busy at work.  But oh well that is behind me.  Last week I only lost 1.8 lbs dropping me down to 289.6 lbs.  This week was much better.  I was very strict on myself and felt that I had to get back on track with motivation.  I lost 5lbs this week putting me at 284.6 lbs.  It was a great week.  I switched up my protein packets and that helped  so much.  It was nice because I felt I fell in a rut and I couldn't get out of it.  So by switching it up I felt like I was more motivated to make sure I was eating everything I was supposed to.  Thank you to everyone that was very supportive this last two weeks and helped me get through the rough times.  As of today I am down 72.4 lbs. in 84 days.

10/18/11

Man it was a very rough week.  I was extremely busy this week and skipped some meals and didn't eat hardly anything..... which you would think would be a good thing.  But it is not.  I only lost 2.2lbs this week.  I am very disappointed in myself but I still lost so that is a positive.  It is great to have Dr. Morris to go check in with every week because it is somebody that actually cares about helping you and when you don't do well he is disappointed with you.    It is very nice have that support.  Work is really busy so I am having to make a conscious decision to eat what I am supposed to.  I put on a pair of me jeans yesterday that I was wearing when I started this diet and even with my belt cinched up they were falling off of me. I am hoping this next week is going to be a great one.